I didn’t realize I could sing until I was 44 years old. Of course, I’d been singing all my life, just under my breath when people were around, and as loud as I cared to when alone.
When i was very young i perfected my act for “Hey Big Spender” . I actually wanted to go on stage to do it, although otherwise shy. I guess because British people can be real piss takers, my attempts to do it were foiled.
I begun to believe i couldn’t sing. No one in my family could sing that i knew of. My mother has an awful voice. I once tried out for choir, the only thing i ever “tried out for” and was dismissed immediately. That’s when i really believed i couldn’t sing.
I can remember a few times when i did forget myself and sing aloud and someone would compliment me, and i would just shrug and say, no, i can’t sing.
All my life i had been passionate about music. Been immersed in it. Secretly sang, openly danced and loved to talk about it. Collected it. Had never been with out it. Then in 2004 at my husband’s 40th birthday party, i let my guard down and i sang out loud in front of people for the first time since i was a child. i sang “Who’s That Lady” by The Isley Brothers, and i gave it everything i had. I had been singing it in the shower/tub/car for decades.
It was an amazing feeling, because i knew it was good. Right then and there i told myself that if i could really sing there would be no stopping me. I was going to take it as far as i could take it. I started singing lessons and sang with my husband and a few friends. We would get together and play and invite people over to play.
I started to get comfortable singing in front of people.
I have always loved poetry and although i had not been prolific by any means, what i had written had been well received. i figured i could write lyrics.
I put an ad on craigslist and met Jess Stroup. Amazing working composer and multi instrumentalist, he trusted me with a wonderful track and i wrote the lyrics and composed the melody for my first ever song, “Gone.”
The first lyrics i gave him i wrote in ten minutes flat and he hated them. He told me to keep only two words. “I’m Gone.” He said “Tell me what that looks like”.
We wrote another song together and both songs were licensed for a mini series that aired in France. I was good at this!
Now, a decade later, I have recorded multiple albums, worked with the legendary Andy Johns, played stages big and small, opening for The Spinners and my music has been licensed for T.V.
I will never stop singing and writing music.
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